It’s been a tough two weeks. My beloved Grandmom died on July 14 at the age of 89.
My heart is still broken. She was so big…yet I don’t think she ever saw herself that way. She was always calm, peaceful, religious, loving, and kind. She loved her family and loved cooking and gardening. Her life was truly about serving and she touched so many lives.
I tried to get back into the swing of things this week and my body would not cooperate. At 1:30am, I lay awake and tossed and turned for another 2-3 hours. At one point, I said to myself, you have to cut yourself some slack. You have a lot on your plate right now – new responsibilities, new schedules, a wonky cash flow, and your grandmom just died. And you were close to her and she was a HUGE part of your life and your family’s life. And it’s all affecting you and it’s normal that it is. And it’s going to take time before you feel settled again.
I talk and teach a lot about self-awareness particularly as a backbone to our brands and who we are being called to be. This has been a real life moment where that’s being tested, not just for myself, but also recognizing that others need space, empathy and forgiveness as well.
My grief comes in waves. We had a gorgeous service for her last Friday and I was so touched by all who came to mourn, honor and celebrate her life. Former high school teachers/staff were there. My former headmaster and priest came as a celebrant of the Mass. The cousins I hadn’t seen in years were there. I looked up at one point and saw that none of us fell in line by immediate family, rather there was this intermingling in the pews of my siblings, cousins, second cousins, great aunts…which is so telling to who we are as a family.
The homily was perfect and so…her. The priest told the story of a famous violinist who played his million dollar violin in Grand Central and here and there people would stop, listen, drop a few dollars into the case, but for the most part, were distracted and busy, rushing through their day. Instead of taking center stage, he and his music blended seamlessly into the scene. If you didn’t pay attention, you could miss him and walk right by, not even seeing or hearing or knowing the beauty right in front of you. Grandmom was exactly like that famous violinist.
I love this photo of her, taken at my wedding in 2006. Love that my photographer captured her spirit here.
October 12, 1927-July 14, 2017
Chrissie DiAngelus is the President & Founder of Art & Connections, a company that launches inspired, purpose-driven women creatives into higher levels of leadership and success. She blends business strategy, arts and a desire to serve into her offerings. Learn more about the company and about Chrissie. Interested in exploring how to work together? Contact Chrissie today.